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Monday
Apr162012

Making time for doing

Hello everybody... I'm back from my few day's break-from-the-norm and it's been a pretty busy, eventful and contemplative week. 

For those of you with children, I'm sure you'll completely relate to what I'm about to say.  When you've got a couple of little ankle biters, you find yourself asking "What did I do with all my time before I had these kids?  Then they grow up, start nursery and school and slowly but surely, life gets back to normal and you start to remember who you are, what you enjoy and start to prioritise the stuff that's put to one side in your life since the day you found out you were pregnant.

But, last week I asked myself "What ever do I do with my time when the kids are not around?".  I achieved all my usual business tasks, I took care of young children, I spent some time with my boys and we spent one of the day's out clothes and IKEA shopping, I took them to the hairdressers, I used up half a day driving Den to and from Heathrow airport and I even got a decent portion of coursework completed. Okay, the blogging went down the pan, but I'd made a conscious decision that was going to happen anyway.

So, today's Monday and we are all back to normal routines and the house is peaceful, it's just me and the cats.  I suppose what I'm highlighting is that I spend too much of my time pondering and even planning what I'm going to do and spend very little time actually implementing it.  My last week was full of doing, doing many different activities and they all got done successfully.  Nobody gave me an extra few hours here and there, it all fitted nicely into 7 days.

My cautious, reticent streak needs to be kicked into line, it comes as a result of being a terrible self promoter, being plagued with lack of self belief and just being a bit embarrassed and uncomfortable.  So with renewed vigour, I am going to cram my hours and days with as much interior design as I possibly can - whether that's in the form of writing my blog, studying with KLC to completion or getting out to events and networking.  And I'll also decide on which area I'm going to develop my design business in, then implement it. I'm going to do them all, this year.  There... said it now.

I'd also like to thank Tracey from procrastinationmama for coming over this weekend and sharing her new project.  She doesn't know this but the very act of her coming over and kind of putting me on the spot, discussing all things design and business and personal objectives and style, has enabled me to gain some much needed confidence and reignite some of the passion that subsides from being afraid and when thinking too much about the negatives in life.

Below is a photograph I took a couple of years back when Den, I and the boys were on an RV trip in the US. We stayed for one night at the luxurious and blingworthy Trump Hotel in Las Vegas and, feeling carefree and inspired, I can remember vividly my thoughts at the moment I stood at the foot of this building and gazed into the sky above. That anything is possible if you put your mind and passion into it.

 

 I hope you've all had a lovely weekend and have learned some new stuff since we last spoke?

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Reader Comments (7)

I completely feel you on this one Sam! But you are so confident when I've met you. You're so bubbly and one of the nicest, warmest people I've met. You have achieved so much too and you're even making your own cushions and selling them. I completely know what you're saying though, as with me my blog has slowly etched away at my time and poor diploma has taken a quiet back-seat. But as long we're both making progress in some shape or form that's the main thing.

Keep being you Sam :)

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMary@HOPInteriors

Sam, I'm with Mary. Having met you I'm so surprised you've said that about your lack of self belief because when I came away from our evening I felt really cross with myself that you were such a go getter and were so sure about what you were doing and I was all like 'I need to finish my course' 'I need to get a job first' and basically making any excuse not to get myself out there. I'm riddled by a lack of confidence and self belief and was wishing I were more like you!

I'm back on KLC with a vengeance, 6am coursework for me. I just work like that, I'm either full on, or can't look at it for a few months. I love your work, you're really talented and I'm so excited to see where it's going to take you xxx

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterannie

oh, it sounds like you might be giving yourself a hard time, you are clearly doing a lot! on the other hand i have those same conversations with myself, because i want to do so much. i really like aby's courses at simplify 101 for getting things in order so that the important stuff is taken care of, and so are the dreams. xx

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterelisa

Hey Sam,

What a great post. I must say that your blog has slowly and surely grown on me and I find myself looking forward to a visit.

You come across feisty and clear about stuff but appreciate that that's not always the case with any of us. I look forward to meeting you on the 28th and putting a face to the chicken keeping wife and mum who haggles in Fez and gets spoilt rotten a lot of the time:)

We are all our own worst enemies and yes, we can all achieve whatever we put our minds to, something I consistently work on... what you're talking about is called Procrastination and my favourite book on the subject is Steven Pressfield's The War of Art.

Welcome back x

Here's to Tracey...

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commentertina

Hi Sam! Seems you and I took a little bloggy break to reevaluate and take action. Like you, I am plagued with self doubt. But, like Tina said, we are our own worst enemies. (BTW, I would never have guessed that about you from reading your blog.) Here's the thing, at least you and Annie know you love interior design and are working your way towards that goal. It really is a huge step in the right direction, and I applaud you both. Me? I haven't even found that THING to work towards yet. OR, maybe I have found it, but I'm letting fear hold me back. Funny enough, I've got a whole post ready to go for Friday that will cover this very topic. Please weigh in.
Great to have you back. I appreciate the new vigor you have...It's inspiring.

April 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTheresa

Ladies, you are all being very sweet and so thank you for your kind words. It's good to be back although this post was not intended to sound 'woe is me' so forgive me if it did. However, I'm very lucky to have your warm support and from such a talented bunch of gals.

@Mary - I do enjoy social interactions and feel right at home in others company. I think it's important to not to spend too much time alone and that can knock confidence, I work best when bouncing off others. You are right about progress and moving forward, we are all far too hard on ourselves. x

@Annie - Perceptions are great aren't they. I find that if I verbally announce an intention to do something, it's kind of like I've made another positive step in that direction. Hearing the words coming out is much stronger and affirming than just listening to them rattling around in my mind. I know what I want to be doing, but it's the actual doing that falls a bit short. I just want to be able to lose the doubt and replace it with some more of the doing and have a bit more faith. BUT, you must not feel cross with yourself (wags finger), I came back from our evening thinking how bright and committed and talented you were Annie, and so glad that we met because we can help and learn from each other and kick each others arses. We all lack confidence but also I think we can use that as an excuse to not 'do'. x

@Elisa - welcome to my blog and thank you for joining the debate. Thank you for highlighting the Simplify 101 courses, I shall give them a look. Yep it sounds like we are all giving ourselves a hard time, your blog is fab and I love your projects! x

@Tina - Hubby calls me 'gobby' lol. I'm great at dishing out advice and telling it how it is, pity I don't use some of that advice on myself, typical huh? We are our own worst enemies but I'm also certain that we cannot achieve things to any degree unless we firmly believe in whatever it is in the first place. It's one thing to say 'I'm going to be an interior designer', but if you don't feel it in your own soul that you can be one, it will never happen. I'm looking forward to meeting you too - it might well be a supercharged event, with all that hot air, those hormones and many opinions racing around :-) I shall give Steven Pressfield's book a look too, thank you x

@Theresa - I'm really glad your time out was fun and that you've made a decision to change your current blogging routine, for more fulfilling personal experiences. I think you are right, you've probably found your next 'thing', it just needs a little persuading to come to the surface and say Hi. I find that writing down two lists - of things you do and don't like to do brings up a pattern and an area of things to then go on and develop. It's a little like my example of saying things out load, a realisation dawns and you don't then feel like you've got lots of pie-in-the-sky ideas, they become actual/concrete. We often refuse to see what we are good at, we use it to stall and avoid making progress. I shall look forward to reading your Friday topic, I think this very subject is destined to flow on for quite some time. Who needs therapy hey? It's all right here!

April 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSamantha Lennie

" It's one thing to say 'I'm going to be an interior designer', but if you don't feel it in your own soul that you can be one, it will never happen."

Sam, that 100% sums up how I felt for a very long time. It's only been literally this year that I've started to feel that I can do it. The blog has helped enormously, most because of reading so many other blogs and chatting to people like you who make me see that it's normal to be full of doubt and a lack of confidence. Why wouldn't we? We've never done this before! Not sure why we all expect to feel confident and self-assured on something we're still learning.

The most useful thing I've learned from KLC is that productivity trumps self doubt. Simple put, the more I produce, the more confident I feel.

Can't wait to see you again next Saturday! xx

April 21, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterannie

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